OK, I admit it, I have become somewhat complacent about this blog lately. When I first heard the call from God to write a blog I was on fire. But with time and the responsibilities of life, things seem to always end up on the back burner. I would say the same thing has happened with my bible study recently. I have a plan in place to get back on track with that…I ordered a study bible that should be coming today that will help me understand more than the traditional bible I’ve been reading, and also I am going to start reading from front to back again instead of jumping around. It was great when I first started doing what my friend termed “bible roulette”…I would sit down thinking about a problem I was having, wait for God to send a book in the bible to my mind and then wait a minute more and I’d receive a number in my mind. Every single time I did that, the chapter I was lead to was specifically about what I was pondering. It was amazing! However, that kind of reading can make you feel like you have ADHD just jumping around. At one point, I had subscribed in my feed burner to a daily reading plan that was sending me a chapter in the Old Testament, the New Testament, and a chapter in Psalms and Proverbs to read each day. That worked great at first but then like everything else, I got busy and my feed burner (I subscribe to a lot of cooking blogs, sociology stuff, etc.) got up over 300+ posts when I quit checking it for a few days. Needless to say that method didn’t work for me! The point of me telling you all this is to say its ok to try and fail at different approaches…just keep trying until you find the one that works for you. I am still fine tuning my approach.
Likewise, telling myself “I’m going to write a blog post every Sunday” (which is what I thought when I first started) wasn’t working and I started feeling like a slacker. Then I decided ok I’ll just write whenever the spirit strikes. Well, that didn’t work so well either because the spirit usually strikes me around midnight when I have to be up for work in a few hours. So I would put it off then get too busy the next day to get back around to it. Then God would kindly put a thought in my mind that I really need to write something. For example, right now I was on the computer to look at movie times today. I am not even dressed yet, just enjoying a day off with Olivia, and had no intention of writing. But thoughts started circulating around my mind about my recent complacency and I realized, this is God’s way of urging me to write. So write I must. And this topic, again, is not what I was planning to write (I seem to be saying that a lot in my posts). Be open to letting God change your plans, He likes to do that sometimes and its actually a great thing when it happens and you hear it.
The only way to keep from becoming complacent about spending time with God each day through prayer, scripture reading and whatever else He calls you to is to make it a priority. I know that is really cliché and sounds too simple but it is true. The reason I didn’t write a post for over a month is simply because it dropped down on my priority list. If I’m not reading my bible nightly like I used to, its because other things took its place near the top of the my list and bumped it down. I am guilty as charged, but I don’t have to feel bad or beat myself up about it, just need to focus on what I can do now to be recommitted to God as my top priority. If anyone can beat themselves up, it is me, trust me! But I have found that if God isn’t beating me up for something, I shouldn’t be either. I take comfort in knowing that and being aware that He is so forgiving.
I am making a pledge today that I will be better at writing more often and dedicating time daily to my bible study. It might not be that I post every Sunday, and that’s ok. I am having so many amazing spiritual experiences lately that I could probably write almost daily but that also wouldn’t be realistic. I work full-time and am a single mom, those are priorities I can’t shirk. But God needs to be at the center of everything, and every time I have made it a point to keep Him there, my life is better because my perspective is in the right place and my faith grows as a result. I wish so much I could somehow share the feelings I have at those times, like a spiritual transplant, because it feels so great even when things aren’t going well around me. However, the best way I can share that is by sharing what works and hopefully you will find a way to experience that peace yourself.
I have to take a minute to thank God for my Savior and for the atonement on this Good Friday. God, you are amazing beyond description. That you would send your beloved Son to suffer and atone for me and my sins is a testament to how much you love all of your children. Thank you God for knowing me and loving me despite all my flaws. Thank you for your perfect Son who is the only way to find true peace and joy in this life, and to find my way back to You in the next. I commit to put You back on the front burner in my life.
God Is Within Reach 